Online Dating Scams You Need to Watch Out For

Internet matches can be a great way to meet “the one” – but it’s also a hotbed for online dating scams that can affect your personal life, your job, and most importantly, your trust. Here are the top signs that you need to watch out for when avoiding dating site scams.

They Want Private Information Too Soon

After a few dates, wanting to know about your family or wanting to add you on Facebook is fair. However, if you haven’t met them yet or only had one date, this is a warning sign. What do they gain from knowing where you live or work? Is that somehow going to improve your relationship right now? The answer is no.

Their Profile Picture Doesn’t Look Legit

Sure, adding a filter or two so you look your best is fair with profile pictures. But you’re in for a dating scam if their picture looks fake or a little too perfect. At this point, try Googling the picture to see where else it appears. If it’s a Facebook page, then you need to be wary since they’re still trying to doctor their photo too much. If you find that picture belongs to a famous model, then odds are it isn’t them. Avoid them and report their profile to the site.

They’re Younger Than You

Age is just a number and love isn’t hindered by it, but it’s a favorite tactic of dating site scammers to pose as someone much younger to get attention.. If you’re contacting by someone who’s several years – even decades – younger than you, be sure to vet their profile and be extra careful when arranging a meeting place. Odds are, you’re in for trouble.

They Tell White Lies

If they say they’re hardly ever on the dating site, yet you can see they have a lot of activity with their profile. They say they’re working out of country but seem strangely up-to-date with local goings-on. Internet dating scammers are persistent but they’re not always smart. If you notice a few inconsistencies in what they tell you or what their profile says, then pass them by – they’re not worth the trouble.

Their Writing Skills Are Poor or Get Worse Over Time

If their first message to you is impeccable, but their second or third is utter garbage in regards to grammar or punctuation, then you might be in for an online dating scam. Often times, scammers won’t make the effort to keep their messages well written, since they’re running several scams at once and don’t have the time. If they are a scammer, they’re showing all the signs. If they’re not, then they might just be stupid and not worth your time.

How Many Dates Before Sex?

The average number of dates before sleeping together has an evolving answer. It’s not the same code of conduct our parents or grandparents knew. You might be asking “We’ve dated for months. Should I have sex with him?” Or be wondering if “pushy” is a word to describe wanting it after just a few meet-ups.

So, let’s put the question to rest once and for all. How many dates before sleeping together?

Survey Says 5 is the Magic Number

According to a study conducted by OkCupid that lasted over a decade across their entire (and growing) userbase, the results are in on how many dates until sex is an option:

“The perfect time for sleeping with someone is (between) three to six dates, more in the middle — not in the beginning and not after marriage.”

While the previous rule of thumb was three dates before sex, this new study shows the best time is around five dates. It gives you time to get to know each other, establishes what you both want before it gets too serious or moves too fast, and by the time date five has arrived, you’ll know how to ask that special someone to have sex. If your partner isn’t up for that, they’ll have clued you in by then.

But Let’s Not Forget That No Two Relationships Are the Same

If you both agreed this was a sex date, then you both know what you’re there for. At that point, the science for when it’s okay to have sex is in your ballpark. Decide what you want from the relationship and ask what your date wants, and then make a judgment call on how comfortable you feel with the person. Even if you agreed in advance that it’s just a hookup, you can back out if you feel uncomfortable. If it’s just some good ol’ fashioned fun, then the five-date rule doesn’t apply. If you’re both looking for something more serious, a delay in the sexy times will make your relationship better.

Why You Should Hold Off

Stats show that couples are happier in long-term relationships if they handle the sex question early on. It opens up a new level in the relationship, and if you’re just not that into each other when the pants come off or sexual tension is half the charm between you two, you don’t want to wait until after marriage to decide that satisfaction and excitement just isn’t there afterwards.

However, a willingness to wait shows a dedication to long-term commitment, a focus on the person and not the “goods,” and gives you a chance to decide if your date is actually kinda weird before you take it to the next level. Sex complicates everything. Yet sex is better if it’s with a great person – clothed and unclothed.

How to Get Sex on the First Date

There’s no shame in knowing what you want and going for it. How to get sex on the first date is less about the woman you choose and more about your charm. For hooking up on the first date, here’s what you need to know:

Go for Relaxed and Confident, Not Sex God

Chicks go crazy for James Bond, but not just because he’s a hunk – it’s because he’s calm, collected, and suave. If you play the sex appeal card too heavily, you’ll come across as fake and even aggressive, which will scare off women or make them think twice about going back to your place with you. Go for relaxed and confident, and you’ll present yourself at your best for a first date hookup.

Dress to Impress

Pick an outfit that enhances your best features. If you’re not very confident in your body, then wear a dark-colored shirt that disguises bad points and draw eyes to your best points. If you work out, then go for something a little tighter to show off your best features. You want to catch her eye immediately and get her fantasies rolling – and to get a girl to have sex with you, you have to do that with your first impression.

Get Your Greetings and Formalities Right

Class will get you a long way to get laid on the first date. When you first meet her at the restaurant or café, stand to greet her, tell her how happy you are to see her, compliment her looks, and most importantly: give her a hug. A hug jumps a lot of social barriers and will make it clear right away that you’re interested. If she acts awkwardly about the hug, then you’ve been given a hint; but if she accepts it, you’re on the right path.

Find Something to Connect About

In conversation, start asking questions and showing interest in what she has to say. People love talking about themselves and if you respond with empathy, you’re showing that you care and are a friendly, approachable person. This will do wonders in setting a fun, relaxed, playful mood going forward.

Ask Her to Leave When She Acts Comfortable

How to get a girl to sleep with you lies in watching her expression, mannerisms, and the way she talks. Does she seem comfortable and friendly? If so, this is your opening to ask if she’d “like to get out of here” in a casual way. If you nail the tone, then you’ll have come across as confident, interested, and even a little mysterious, which will make her even more likely to say yes. However, if she says no, the key to your second chance is responding just as casually and politely. You don’t want to come across as a weirdo or as desperate, so how you respond to a rejection is just as important as how you respond to a “yes.” She could be testing you, and later offer herself to head back to your apartment.

Online Dating Safety Tips You Need to Know

Online dating safety tips are a dime a dozen, but with new dating sites and online experiences appearing every day, the list needs updating. Here are a few little-known but incredibly valuable tips for how to date online safety that you need to know.

Have Photos Just For Online Dating

Ever tried Googling yourself? It can be scary. How is safe online dating? It depends on how you manage your private information, which anyone can use as research keywords to find out more about you. Take separate pictures for your dating profile, that way no one can Google all the way to your Facebook or LinkedIn profile, which could lead to those internet stalking horror stories.

Keep Contact Off Social Media

If you want to keep in contact with your date through something besides text, then give them your email address – never your Facebook profile. If the relationship turns south, you don’t want them spamming your Facebook friends or stalking you from afar.

Meet in a Public Place

No great love affair has ever been hindered by meeting in a public place. As a bonus, if you both know the place, it gives you both a chance to relax. You are familiar with the area and won’t get stuck with a bad menu.

Give a Trusted Friend Your Itinerary

For offline and internet dating safety, tell a trusted friend who you’re meeting with, when you’ll be back, and even arrange for a check-in at some point during the date. A simple phone call will ensure someone knows to come look for you if you don’t answer, can give you an escape route if the date is failing, and if all is golden, it’s a quick, “Everything’s great, thanks,” before continuing with you awesome dinner.

Watch Your Drink

When it comes to dating safety tips, it’s not just what goes in your drink, but how much comes out of your glass. Of course you know to watch for roofies, but getting tipsy on a date can be just as dangerous. If you’re nervous, purposefully order non-alcoholic drinks so that you don’t risk over-drinking to soothe your nerves. It’ll make you more aware of danger, make you more capable of leaving if things turn south, and at the least, will keep you from making an idiot of yourself.

Don’t Depend on Your Date for Transport
If your high school sweetheart is taking you to prom, picking you up is a nice gestures. Not so with online dating. Be sure to take a bus, drive yourself, or have a friend transport you to and from the date. If the date goes sour, you don’t want to be dependent on them to drop you off where you ask – or rob yourself of a chance to leave with or without their permission.